Get your mind out of the gutter! Our Beat It tee is hot and fresh, and helps you remember one of the greatest musicians ever. Boom. Enough said. He is the King of Pop!
Ok, not enough said. Let’s say that you need this tee to impress your friend Billy Jean. The issue is a very black and white issue. Just beat it. Well, beat your friends to this shirt. If you don’t, you’re just plain bad. But why stop at one? Don’t stop till you get enough. With the way you make me feel, you are not alone.
Ya, so since a cure for good actors getting the clap has not been found, we decided to do another round of pictures with one of our best selling shirts: Good Actors Get the Clap. Lucky for us, we found another model who was willing so put her lovely face out there in the good name of Actors and Claps everywhere. Who is she, you may ask? Emma, I may answer. Want more of her or anyone else? Just ask! In the meantime, check out the shirt. Duh.
I hate to say this because you just might not want to hear the answer, but smokers are going to burn in hell when they die from smoking. Yes, in a trouble double over the top under head scratching study, this has been proven! *funded by hippies of the world, inc.* But, we were able to find two very non-smoker type people to show off one of our newest designs, The Truthiness About Smoking. Check ‘em out. Voice your opinion… that is, if you still have your voicebox. OH SNAP!
If you are of the Asian persuasion, you are going to want to grab our latest $10 shirt, I’m Asian. So I Can Kick Your Ass. It will give your friends and enemies that not-so-subtle suggestion that, yes, their suspicions are correct, and you DO know kung fu, tae kwon do, ninjutsu, aikido, or karate (or some wicked combination thereof.) Hey, if you’re going to be stereotyped, might as well use it to your advantage. Plus, like I said, it’s only $10 right now. It’s the perfect complement to your $200 designer jeans.
Excuse the pun, but hells ya, we loves us some LOST over here. So why not share our excitement of the final episode countdown by giving peeps some money off their awesome t-shirts!? Starting right now (Tuesday night the 13th), we have discount code LOSTWATCHER that will get you ????? off of your order. Why is it all a mystery? Because so is LOST! The discount code will change each week… so you ‘ll have to keep coming back to check and see what it will bring. I knew Desmond was da shizzle! www.conchtees.com
Evan at iwearyourshirt.com also wore one of our shirts this year. He got the super popular 1up Yours shirt and had a blast with it. Watch him tell his neighbors, “Up yours!” Also, get 30% off all Conch Tees merchandise with the discount code UPYOURS for “Forever” (minus a few days or so.) Oh, and don’t make him feel too bad for mispronouncing our name. Apparently a lot of people say “conTCH” instead of “conK.” Who knew?
Everyone is saying it these days: “I have assburgers.” It’s the new “I’m OCD” or “I’m ADD.” Ugh, it makes me cringe. If you know someone who constantly reminds you of how he or she has “assburgers,” you should totally get that person this I Have Assburgers shirt as a gift. It’s only $10 for a limited time. Everyone will get a kick out of it (except maybe the dude with “assburgers” who will at least pretend not to understand the humor.) Better yet, don’t waste your money on those people; just get the shirt for yourself and wear it whenever they are around. Then, when they say, “You don’t have assburgers, and you spelled it wrong,” simply respond with, “Exactly.”
There are a lot of low-brow St. Patrick’s Day t-shirts out there. We thought we might raise the bar a little with an homage to the great Irish literary genius, James Joyce, with our I’m Pro Joyce t-shirt. What better way to say, “I’m an educated and well-read lush,” than with a t-shirt of this caliber. Turn your nose up at the world as you down that pint of green beer. Only $10 for a limited time.
Recently, a fan by the name of Float participated in a date auction. Float, being a secret marketing genius, knew that he could fetch top-dollar for himself by wearing the right outfit. It just so happens that the right outfit in this case was an I’m Easy But Not Diseasy! shirt from ConchTees.com. Float’s genius did not let him down. He was purchased for well over $100, one of the highest bids of the evening! We don’t know if he put out or not, but admitting to that would probably be illegal in most states anyway (like 98% of them to be precise.) Congratulations, Float! And thanks for the pics!
Yes it’s true, we found one of our newest models, Bree, sporting our Two Dads Are Better Than None shirt while we were out the other night. Of course, we had to grab a pic. Spank you very much, Bree! Follow her on Twitter.
